8.16.2010

That Kind Of

Do you ever believe that if you shut your eyes hard, close your ears and think hard enough, you'll be in a different land when you wake up?

It's been that kind of night.

Suddenly, maintaining friendships seems more of a task, a chore. One does not need to hear the same each week. I know that it would so much better and easier to not devote energies to introspecting and changing. After all, one is quite loved for the way they have always been. I knows that I should not give up on friends, however one is very tempted to. I have apologized so many times for crimes I never knew I had committed, yet one perseveres. I realize that sooner or later, I will lose all my patience and scream till nothing matters anymore, yet something stops me. Anger has never suited one's countenance.

It's been that kind of night.

I feel no anger, no rage. I feel melancholic. I wish to curl up in the comfort of my blanket and listen to Julie London till the first rays of the dawn hit my face and the dog comes up to awaken me. I wish to sing and paint for a while, without wondering what I am doing with life. I wish this would all just end.

It's been that kind of night.

Signing Out,
It's Been That Kind of Post.


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